(─‿‿─)
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┌( ಠ‿ಠ)┘
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⊂•⊃_⊂•⊃
⋋ō_ō`
SpongeBob SquarePants: There it is. The finest eating establishment ever established for eating. The Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty, with the Help Wanted sign on the front. I've waited years for this moment. I'm gonna go in there, march straight up to the manager, look at him straight in the eye, lay it on the line, and - I can't do it!
[turns away, but is stopped by Patrick]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick!
Patrick: Where do you think you're going?
SpongeBob SquarePants: I was just...
Patrick: No, you're not. You go in there and get that job.
SpongeBob SquarePants: No, I can't! Don't you see?
Patrick: Who's first words were "May I take your order?"
SpongeBob SquarePants: Mine were.
Patrick: Who made a spatula out of toothpicks in shop class?
SpongeBob SquarePants: I did.
Patrick: Who's a... who... Ungh... Who's a big, yellow cube with holes?
SpongeBob SquarePants: I am!
Patrick: Who's ready?
SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready!
Patrick: Who's ready?
SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready!
Patrick: Who's ready?
SpongeBob SquarePants: *I'm ready!*
Mr. Krabs: Attention all employees! Just giving you a heads-up. I'll be conducting a surprise uniform inspection in one hour. Whoever doesn't pass gets the boot.
[Pulls out a boot]
Mr. Krabs: This boot to be exact. It's very stinky, and you have to wear it all day.
SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm sick, Patrick. I'm going to the doctor.
Patrick: What? Oh no, you can't go!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Why not?
Patrick: I know a guy who knows a guy who went to the doctor, and the doctor's office is a horrible, horrible place.
SpongeBob SquarePants: It can't be as horrible as the suds.
[Sneezes]
Patrick: Oh, it is, SpongeBob. First, they make you sit in a... waiting room!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Is that the horrible part?
Patrick: No, it gets worse. They make you read... old magazines!
[SpongeBob shrieks]
Patrick: Then the doctor pulls out his stethoscope.
SpongeBob SquarePants: No!
Patrick: Yes! It's a device so sinister, so icy cold when it touches your bare flesh that... Pssh!
SpongeBob SquarePants: Aaah! No doctor! No stethoscope! No magazines! No Pssh! Patrick, I don't want to go to the doctor.
Patrick: Exactly.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Hey, everybody! Not ripped pants...
[Rips out pants]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Pants ripped off. Someone call the police, there's a pants thief on the loose.
Computer: Plankton: 1% Evil, 99% Hot Gas
1. Suka gede-kecil . Ex: eH KmW lAgIy apHa?? BlS KmEnt AQuwG DumS. [sampai ga bisa di bedain mana 'i' ,mana 'L']
2. Bahasanya sok imut dan lebay. Ex: aduch aquw lupa niyh… Kmuw lgiy phaa??,,,,,.. Ett fs akyu dunt.. Hihihi,imyud kant aque,,,,,…. [najis ! tanda koma dan titik nya itu yaoloh apa banget]
3. Nick akun internet sok paling oke. Ex: princez yatti.. Queen munawaroh.. Tati qiyutz abiyz.. Marniiy imud.. Omazt teopebeggetthe. [zz..]
tulisan. . . . .jadi . . . . :
1. Aku : Akyu, aquwh, akug, kuu, etc
2. Kamu : kmuw, qm, kamyu, etc , etc
3. Lagi : agg, lagy, agiy, etc
4. Apa : aph, appa, aphaa, apva, etc
5. Nanti : ntiy, ntii, nhantiy
6. Knapa : nphaa,naph,qnpa, etc
7. Maksud : mkcutt,maksudt,magsyut,etc
8. Masa : mshaa,msaa,mzaa,mca,mz,etc
9. Sih : cie,cy,cih,cyieh, etc
10. Siapa : saph,cpha,cpa,syph,shappa,chapa
11. Love : luv,luph,laff,laft,lup,loph,lep [?]
dsb.
-Namanya digonta ganti
-Kalo Requestnya di Konfirm trus si Alay nulis kayak gini : (thanks udah dikonfirm, ini capa dimana? , who’s there???, mind intro???) plis deh kan udah ada namanya, ngapain coba ditanya lagi
-Pake nama-nama gak penting (ex: Akku Sayanxx Kamu, Pam Pam Anak Baek, Karin si Manyun, Donna Massiver juga, etc )
-Status diupdate tiap menit (kalo lw ke Home tuh alay ada mulu)
-Kalo statusnya di”Like” si Alay komen (makaciiya udah dikasih jempol)
-Sering Kirim Komen di Wall (bagi alay banyak komen berarti gaul)
-Ngeadd-in orang biar FBnya Full trus bikin yang kedua (ihh.. gak pentng banget)
-Sok Ngartis (di statusnya : aduh besok syuting lagi, aduh syutingnya lama bgt yakk, duhh bsok pemotretan etc..)
-suka ngirim bulbo ga jelas di fs :”akko onlenndh dcnniih” ato “ayokk perang cummendh cmma saiia” etc (paling parah lagi kalo ngirim bulbo dengan judul “********” tapi isinya kosong!) ih kampret bner deh tu orang orang alay.
-menganggap dirinya eksis di friendster (kalo comments banyak itu berarti anak gaul jadi lomba banyak-banyakan comment) *please deh ga bgt! emang kenapa coba kalo commentnya banyak?dapet rekor muri bu? ga penting bgt deh..
-kalo ada org yg cuman view profil kita , kita bilang gini : “hey cuman view nih?” ato “heey jgn cuman view doang,add dong! (kalo emang segitu pentingnya orang nge-ADD buat kita..kenapa kita ga nge-ADD dia waktu kita mau ngasih testi?)
-friendster dipenuhi glitter-glitter norak yang pastinya bisa ngerusak retina mata zz
1. Gayanya nunjuk bibir yg lg monyong. [eurgh =.=]
2. Foto 1 album begitu2 aja. Gaya sama. Baju sama. Background sama. Selang waktu pemotretan yg ga bgitu jauh. Dan kalau di hp, ngeliatnya jd kayak animasi. [ough . ]
3. Foto sok imut,dari atas, matanya jadi jereng gajelas gtu.
dsb.
suka niru kebiasaan tokoh sinetron.
1. Korban Kepompong
suka ngomong ‘ii . .wauw.. ‘
2. Korban Cinta Laura
logat ngomongnya jadi ke barat baratan.
3. Suka ngomong “plizzz degh!”
dsb.
1. Ke sekolah pake rok ngatung. Padahal pant*tnya gede.
2. Kaos kaki warnanya shocking . Haha.
3. Pake headband . Padahal ga pantes .
4. Kalau ketawa lebay. padahal ga lucu-lucu amat.
5. Nyerobot giliran orang . Ex: A lg baca buku. . Eh si Alay langsung ngerampas tuh buku. Tapi udah di tangan,bukunya ga diapa apain . [disgusting]
6. Nyoret2 tembok sekolah, dgn tulisan Gede . BOLD kuadrat. Contoh tulisan :
-tanggal jadian. 290245~300309 never die . [ampun. Mau ngapain sih. Geje. Ada yg peduli gitu?]
-nama sendiri. Tp narsis.
Wati qiudz . Luph luph
-nama julukan pasangan ex :
WAwan RIAti forever.
-curhatan hati . Haha.
Ex:
Qny kMW Ting9alkant aqUW … Bla bla bla
dsAR cWo bNgs@Dt. GuWe bnCy LwU San9atD. [emg cwo lo ga bnci ama lo?]
dsb.
-udah rambutnya tipiiis. . .nyaris botak sekali jambak. . Sok di keriting . Jadi kya anak kampung . Xp
- rambutnya tebel. . .kya yg buat ngebersihin sarang labalaba. . tapi nekat di poni. NEKAT . ! ! Udah ga bebentuk . Zz.
-laki2 : di poni ala ganjen band . Pake wax sampe lepek . Kaya abang2 yg suka mangkal di pos kosong.
8. Suka pake rol rambut pas pelajaran . Kaya ibu kos . Bawa strikaan skalian !DON'T BE AN ALAY GENERATION!!!
9. Suka mangkal di kamar mandi . Ngaca . Nyisir . Bedak-an . Dan hal ga penting lainnya .
10.Kalo ke Mall cuma mejeng doang, padahal mah gak beli apa-apaan
(thanks wat anak-anak anti anak alay)